He loves me like no other
 I'm fulfilled
Mind set to HIM
Satisfaction's undenied
when he loves me.
I'm heaven sent
When we meet in the darkest recesses of our minds
Connecting on some serious shit
He makes it all right to just let go
I flow, I flow.
I'm unashamed
When he kisses my spot
I'm lost within him
Deep within him
Understanding him on a higher level
I'm breathless taking him in
I can't deny him my first fruits.

Copyright Tamia Timberlake 2008

A few days ago I was listening to a CD I've had for some time and I came across a song on this CD called, "Mera Sacha Si Pyar, that I became obsessed with. The result was this poem.  Below I've posted the song for your listening pleasure while you read the poem and after. -Tamia-

13 Mera Sacha Si Pyar

My lover left me some time ago

My lover
can you hear my song?
I sing it everyday to pacify my restless heart
The heart you once tended to like a priceless work of art.

Remember our song?
The one that once tied us in nights
of unbridled passion.
Remember you'd feed me ripened fruits
then lick the juices which ran so freely?
I would feed you from my bosom
of which you took much delight.

My lover
I've cried a river of tears
so many tears that I've 
found myself drowning in desire.
I've suffocated on this store of love
and found myself desperate to breath you again.

My lover
Do take pity on me.
I've tried with no relief to end this suffering on my own
I'm so saddened to say
the end is blind to me.
The fire you lit so many years ago
yes, it still burns within me.

How I wish I could accept that you are gone
but it seems I'm destined to suffer.
I say, if this is what I have to endure
in hopes that one day you'll return
I won't complain
but, instead
I'll count it a blessing
and
continue singing our song.

(C) Tamia C. Timberlake 2008

I recently saw a documentary called, "The Story of the Weeping Camel".  The story follows a Mongolian camel that rejects her newborn white camel. 

I am different
yet I know not why?

I was born like the other young around me.
My mother did not tend to me
like the other mothers tended their newborns.
The hand of man welcomed me into this
foreign wilderness.

My mother pushes me away
as I try to suckle
a first taste I am denied.
My first meal came courtesy of my owners.

I am different
yet I know not why?

We are both the same
cast from the same hand
centuries have seen our kind come and go
our survival has been in our ability to stand together.
We are nomadic by nature
one leads and the others follow
but where do I fit in
when even my mother rejects me?

I am different
yet I know not why?

I have hope that one day she will welcome me
and finally accept me as her child.
I know she envies the other mothers who tend
dutifully to their young.  When they cry the mothers
call out.  When I cry there is silence.  I hold out hope
that one day my mother too will recognize my cry
and come running to be at my side.

I am different
yet I know not why?

Momma sits at the kitchen table with her head buried in her hands,
dressing gown open exposing the defilement of her once holy temple.
On the table before her sits a lit cigarette set to slow burn
smoke ascending like a sacrificial offering to some long lost god.

She cries puddles of tears destroying perfectly applied make-up
but, she's still pretty in my eyes. 
Soon there will be a knock at the door and she'll send me out to play.
"Don't come back here until I call ya", she scolds me as she scoots me out the door.
"I know momma", I reply, as I slowly descend the steps secretly wishing I could be the man to provide for and protect us. Though I'm young, I know what my momma does and why she does it.  But, I love her; love her like no other and I always will.

(C) Tamia C. Timberlake 2008

.

Come gently good night

we've been long time lovers

tied in shadows and darkness

avoiding freely

the contemptuous light.

Embrace me like long lost friends

who lost their way trying to find themselves

kiss me as if we'll never meet again

like the world will shortly end.

Come gently good night

stay long

pass slow

Copyright ©2008  Tamia Cherise Timberlake

Day bleeds into night

Night bleeds into day

Until there's no visible separation.

I'm behind a partition of glass

observing my life

as it's played out on a gigantic movie screen

and there's nothing I can do to stop it

No place to run and hide.

I can't even shield my eyes.

I'm forced to watch in silence

and complete confusion

as it's played forward and backward

morbidly slow (frame by frame)

then at warp speed (what did I miss?).

How do I turn this shit off?

(C) Tamia C Timberlake 2008

Exploring the Bi-Polar Condition

I've had this recurrent dream since I was a young child.  I am alone in absolute darkness.  I am floating and weightless.  The silence is deafening.  I am at peace and anxious at the same time.  Suddenly, I notice in the distance a pinpoint of light.  The blackness surrounding me magnifies the light. I am both drawn to it and afraid of it.  What is this light? 

There's this theme that I notice running through my life.  Opposites! Yin/Yang!  I guess it has always been about balance.  If we are off balance in life we can't move forward.  Instead, we are left teetering in one position always about to fall.  Your life has to be balanced in order to have a happy and fulfilled life, right? I believe this to be true. 

I've always wanted to know what this dream meant. When I told my therapist about this dream she said that it could mean many things. So, I've decided to be more aware of what is happening around me when I have this dream again. I'm going to make a conscience effort to write down all the details.  I think it will help to give this dream clarity.  In the meantime I'm pondering these questions:

The Finders Keepers Series are a collection of  items of "relevance" I've found while browsing the net.  I've fallen in love or like with them for one reason or another and decided to share them with you.

Another web-find, Two Loons for Tea, have a cool vibe.  I absolutely loved this song when I first heard it on Imeem.
I could write for hours listening to this song over and over again.